Rejoining the Land of the Living

I think the pain flare is ending, thank God.  Two weeks of barely hanging on, constantly wondering if the ER would be at least more comfortable, trying to shower regularly and maintain a full-time job...it was exhausting. 

Unable to get in touch with my Dr. Fourth Opinion on Tues, I made the executive decision to stop taking the Pill.  He didn't think it was causing the flare and Dr. Third Opinion hadn't thought my last Pill adventure was the cause for the last bad flare, but the flares happened with uncannily similar timing from the day I started the Pill.  I'm officially done with it for now and done with their professional opinions about that matter.  Hmph.

I started feeling better within a day or two of stopping the Pill, and now I feel almost back to my regular, pre-flare level of yuckiness.  It feels AMAZING.  I ran errands for 3 full hours yesterday and swept my front porch today and have felt the foreign sensation of actually feeling happy.  Who knew my fairly high baseline pain level could feel like such a relief.

I have an appointment with Dr. Fourth Opinion tomorrow and I don't even know where to start with him.  I'm disappointed in how long it takes him to get back to me, and sometimes he gets his nurse to do the call-backs, meaning I can't ask him questions.  I need to know what to do when the pain is so bad I'm considering going to the ER....every day for 2 weeks straight.  I need somebody on my side.

My PT was great this week, though.  I couldn't make it to our session because I was laid up at home, but she facilitated communications with my doctor about how to proceed with treatment.  I don't think her sessions are really to blame for the flares, after all; lots of data point to the Pill instead.

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After weeks of not uttering a word about adoption to my husband, I broached the topic again today.  It was so nice to feel like I could talk about it again, like I have the tiny bit of leftover emotional energy to invest in the discussion.  I wasn't able to think about it for weeks—just no emotion to spare.

Right before we left for the beach last month, we met with a local couple who is an excellent adoption resource.  Had a terrific conversation with them and plan to talk with them some more soon.  They told us they'll provide guidance on what to do next, how to proceed with research, which is exactly what we need. 

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Worried about getting through this work week since I'm still not completely functional, but at least I have a very understanding boss and a flexible work-from-home policy.  I tell my boss I'm having health issues and he doesn't ask questions...I don't really want to get into the whole dysfunctional woman parts convo with him.

Hope you guys have had a nice weekend!